Pengislahan diri.

Bismillahirrahmanirahim..

Assalamualaikum and hello

Pernah tak korang terfikir nak berubah? Pengislahan diri?
Kalau pernah... alhamdulillah..
Aku pown ada juga lah ingin berubah.. ku fikir senang.

jauhi yang dilarang
Buang lagu2 tak bermanfaat
Jaga pandangan mata dari membaca atau melihat gambar2 yang tak bermanfaat..
Tukar attitude
tinggalkan gaya hidup yang bebas pergaulannya..
tukar penampilan...

Hakikatnya, wahai rakan2 seperjuangan ku..
Itu semua memerlukan kudrat yang sangat sangat sangatlah BESAR!!
tak terkira berapa kali aku telah jatuh semula ke lembah kejahilan..
Entah berapa kali aku bangkit semula fikir ingin berubah tapi tetap kalah dengan nafsu dan godaan syaitan..
Aku takut.. Aku masih takut..
Takut nak tinggalkan segala2 yg telah lama melekat dalam diri.. takut aku kehilangan kawan.
Aku takut sangat2...
Dan itulah kesilapan yang telah aku buat.
Iaitu, takut kepada hal duniawi. Nampak sangat hati aku ni, masih jauh dengan Allah...Istighfar lah wahai hati..

Sekarang aku terfikir.. kalau aku tulis semua perjalanan aku untuk mengislahkan diri dalam blog, dan orang membaca nya..
Apakah hukum nya? Apakah ini menandakan aku riak? aku ingin dipuji? Harap tak lah.. Saya hanya ingin berkongsi bersama2 rakan2 diluar sana yang ingin berubah juga..

Satu perkara yang saya belajar dari kegagalan yang lalu,
Setiap orang cara berubah nya berlainan..
Kita semua mempuanyai background yang sangat lah berbeza...
Maka wajarlah kita terima nasihat orang tetapi kita harus juga sesuaikan ilmu yang kita ada tu dengan kehidupan kita..
Mana tahu, cara orang lain itu kekadang tak boleh masuk dengan hidup kita, surrounding kita..

Mana tahuu....

nothing

Tonight, I can't sleep...
I wonder why?

No particular topic to talk about tonight a.k.a early morning now since it's almost 4 am.. and my mom will wake up in an hour to prepare for sahur.

hey guys,
since it's ramadhan now, how's your Fasting?? InsyaAllah boleh punya lah.. Ingat kalau nak puasa tu jangan puasa sesaje tau.. puasa biar betul2. Macam mana tu puasa betul? haaa korang search lah sendiri yer.. You can search them in Youtube, through books or better more... find someone Alim, someone who you practices Islam fully in their life.

Malam ni my English is abit loony, so, sorry for my broken English. Kejap melayu kejap English.. kalau pakai English ayat terabur. haaa lantak korang lah.. If you don't understand any of my posts in Malay.. please do ask. Please, no shyness is allowed!! XP

Speaking of shyness... I am also a very shy person. Well... at first.
After a few months together, I can be a very Idiotic person you'll ever met. Okay now I'm talking nonsense...

I'm sleepy now. sooo Good bye guys. Selamat bersahur kepada yang Islam!!!

~Cherish your life~

Random??

Assalamualaikum.

I never thought that business is very wide.
All these years I've always targeted myself to study for engineering and I even narrowed my mind without I'm realising it. I always condemned people that they were narrow minded and slow in development, but it turns out that I am one.


Sometimes, it is true...there's a saying, what you see in others, is what in you..

Maybe? I saw that girl is stupid and a very selfish kid and I want to avoid being friends with her. It turns out that I too, a selfish girl and I wondered why people are avoiding. (this is just an example)

Let alone of how people sees in you. You think you are good enough? Well there are always other people who are more better than you.
In my religion, we've been tought to see upon the people lower than you for you to feel grateful of what you have. No. Don't take this wrong.. What I meant by 'see upon the people lower than you' is by be friends with them. Respect them as how you want people to respect you.

Aku ni pown, bukan lah seorang yang perfect and aku realize ada org lebih tak perfect dari aku. Korang pown ada rasa macam tu jugak tak? kalau ada, baguslah... Sifat rendah diri mmg bagus tuk ada dalam diri. Rendah diri kerana Allah. Tapi jangan lah rendah kan sangat diri tu smpai sanggup binasa kan diri sendiri.

HEy guys?
I think I've really gone off hte topic. Actually there aren't any real topic for this post anyway. That's why I started from one topic to another totally different topic, but I guess there are some connection. Right??

Anyway guys,
Today's lesson that I have is to be happy with yourself and be yourself!! Be confident with yourself, for you are who you are and you know what you're capable of.. :)

Good night and Happy Ramadhan!! :)

to be written

Bismillahirrahmaninrahim...

Aku terasa seperti ingin membuat satu lagi blog. yang smorang tak tahu lagi tentang blog itu. dan aku fikir... aku nak letak segala kisah hidup aku dalam tu. I don't care what happens any more.. kind of like a journal...

Starting a new life...InsyaALlah..

Lies..

I remember when I first entered JMTi. If you read any previous post I've mentioned about this place. Anyway, as a newbie in the area, we have to be apart of the hostel activity to get to know better with the seniors. I still remember they call a roll call at almost midnight after a tiring day. I'm not sure why but in that particular roll call, they always advice us not to trust the boys in JMTi. Back then, I agree with them. I even met with a guy (senior)! I thought he was not the kind of 'guy' my seniors talking about. Well who does! He's a member of the Binnadwah ( an islamic society held, every place have one ), so people respect them for that. I trust him for that.

He pours sweet words and all, but back then, I don't even liked him. More to words. I don't even look at him just because I have a crush on somebody else.

Unfortunately, I did fell to his traps of ugly sweetness. I thought, WHY? Why did I accept him? Is it because my crush has a crush on my best friend? My heart broke and I need someone to repair it for me? I see... I think that's the case.

I never thought after countless of times I tried to separate myself with this 'senior', i've fallen in love with his Dakwah. but i was blind. I forgot why I won't accept him back then. I was confused and it's a relief I asked help from a senior (girl). I asked her opinion. Then she asked me something that reminds me of who he was(?). My senior (girl), she told a story about this guy. I got scared. Is this why he silents himself just like the way he did in the story? Is this for real?

I hate to be lied to. It hurts. Painfully and slowly killing me in the inside. How can they give false hope to those who are hoping? You're so cruel.

My mistake to even trust you. I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself for not learning from my mistakes. I'm too dumb to see that coming. It's hard. I've been lied and back stabbed by my own closest friends back then and even by someone who are very very very close to me. I've lost my confidence to trust anybody and I wrote it in here to let you guys know. If any of you ever got hurt by my harsh words or you got hurt by me not sharing anything with you, please accept my apology. I just got traumatized. Since JMTi, I tried to be open a bit...but it all ends badly. Always the same...

There are few people that I trust, and I know that person's heart... I just hope they won't let me down. I also will try to keep our relationship together if possible, FOREVER (I'm not a psychopath, don't worry).

Every person has their dark story and we as a person, wants to hide it from people as far from people as we could. We won't know other people's story unless they're willing to tell you, and if they did, you might not understand their feelings. So, we can't judge someone for their attitude and wrongdoings. Forgot about them. Let's think about ourselves. If you can't be a better person, how can anybody be a better person? Be a leader, and invite your follower.

I take trust very seriously, because breaking trust can break hearts more devastatingly.

~Cherish your life~
A.Q.

P.S. It's quite a relief I write it down here and open up a bit. I just step out of my comfort zone because letting people know bits 'bout me. (very sensitive about feelings and relationships).

Sahabat

Uhibukafillah.
Aku cinta kau kerana Allah.

Sebuah cerpen yang ditulis oleh Hilal Asyraf dalam koleksi cerpen terbarunya yang berjudul "Simfoni Cinta".
Air mata hampir berguguran tika ku baca disaat mana dua karakter dalam cerpen itu punyai masalah salah seorangnya dan seorang lagi sanggup gadaikan wang ringgit yang beribu demi sahabat dia.

Ya Allah. Indahnya persahabatan mereka.
Aku terfikir...Mereka adalah sahabat dari sekolah menengah, malah mereka juga tidak sebaya. Namun persahabatan mereka yang dibina atas nama Allah dan berdasarkan konsep Islam yang telah merapatkan lagi hubungan mereka.
Andai kata. Sahabat aku yang dua orang itu, aku masih ragu2 dengan persahabatan mereka terhadapku...Bolehkah ianya dipanggil sebagai persahabatan?
Apa itu erti sebenar persahabatan? Adakah aku perlu jadi sahabat yang baik jika aku mahukan seorang sahabat yang baik juga? Sedangkan aku sendiri tidak tahu bagaimana seorang sahabat yang baik itu...

Seorang senior aku, dia telah hantar satu post didalam Instagram. Menurut post itu, dia kata ramai yang menuduh bahawa ahli usrah dan para soleh dan solehah berlagak konon katakan "Aku sayang kau kerana Allah". Yang ramai itu menuduh ahli2 ini hidup dalam angan-angan dan fantasi yang direka-reka sendiri bagi mengelak dari kesusahan dunia yang tegar ini. Namun, senior aku melawan semula dengan mengatakan dia setuju dengan tuduhan mereka. Dia juga kata, dia memang hidup dalam fantasi yang direka semata-mata, malah dunia ini juga sebenarnya adalah fantasi juga. Realiti kita adalah Akhirat kelak. Dimana segala-galanya adalah benar dan disitulah dimana segala rahsia akan terbongkar termasuklah tipuan dunia. Dunia itu hanya lah hidupan sebentar dan fantasi sahaja.

Aku agak sentap tika membaca perkara itu. Ya. Aku setuju dengan pendirian dia. Bersahabat biarlah kerana Allah. Barulah kita akan tahu yang mana realiti dan yang mana fantasi. Bila kita bersahabat kerana Allah, sahabat kita akan sentiasa ingatkan kesilapan kita tanpa ragu dan dia akan sentiasa tarik kita ke jalan Allah. Mana tahu, dengan itu kita akan juga terselamat dari tipuan dunia dan syaitan yang tak lekang menghasut kita.

Namun, untuk mencari persahabatan sebegini...ia agak susah. Aku pun masih tercari-cari. Semoga kita dapat ketemu dengan persahabatan yang berlandaskan Islam pada suatu hari nanti. Putus asa is not an option. Dengan usaha gigih, suatu hari nanti, kita bakal temuinya.

Chaiyook!!

~Cherish your life~
A.Q.

A Comic. :)

HEllooo guys!!! and Assalamualaikum. :)

I've just finished reading this cute comic and I think I want to share it with you guys and girls. :)

That's the volume for the first three that I've read. Actually this comic does not belong to me. It belongs to my sister. We kinda like to collect comics and somehow I thought this comic is boring so I didn't buy it. Just reading it to fill up some free time and my first impression was like WUEEEKK!! It got something to do with Korean pop stars. This comic is what they call as "Fan's Fictions". Soooo.... the insides is not true. FICTION!!! Take note about that.

As I was reading with full of Yukkiness (I'm not a fan of Korean pop stars), the storyline caught my eye. IT's interesting. The mysteries, the naiveness, the evil and plotting of an evil plan. Somehow, the comic artist is very good in plotting a twisting story.

Here, I'm gonna say, yes I'm gonna say it.. I recommend you guys to read this comic. I don't know about world selling about this comic, but I'm writing this entry is to focus more to Malaysian readers. :)

Another volume is out. Volume 4. My sister said she wants to buy it and I'm gonna wait till she buys it. hehehe~~

This is the pic of the 4th volume.


Thank you for reading.
~Cherish your life~
A.Q.

A locket

Assalamualaikum and Hello guys,
For today...

I have many 'wants' in this world. Kinda materialistic aren't I? There's this one thing that I've been searching the since I was a little kid, and I can't seem to find one that are up to my likings. I'm pretty dissapointed when I found some and it may be too heavy, or too big or it's design are not my taste.

Do you want to know what I'm talking about here? Well....

It kinda looks like this. If it's antique the better. When I was a kid, I always read books that (old books by old writers) like Enid Blyton. Sometimes in this book they mention about lockets and as I search what is a locket...I fell in love for the first time (material-wise). Some people do not understand why I want a locket for? It just a simple looking and can open like a window where you can put pictures in it. "you can get it anywhere," they said. I don't want the just-can-get-anywhere locket. I want the ONE. The special one and to me, the special one is an antique one. Seems old and second handed, but it's not always to have a jewelry that is old. It must have a history to it and people doesn't want it anymore. so I'm dreaming like, I want to continue the locket's journey. :) Then pass it down to my next generation. Sounds fairy tail like but who cares. It's impossible for someone like me to get a fairy tail like love story ( like some of my friends does ), so why not I'm creating one for myself? Who knows a miracle can come along with this quest I'm taking.

How about you guys? What things that you want most? What is your dream? What is your fairy tail?

Mind to share?

Thank you for reading.
~Cherish your life~
A.Q.

Friends?

Hello and Assalamualaikum.

I always got worried about the how people thinks of me, but now... I just don't know. Here's a story about my little sister. She's in the 'difficult' age ( you know what I mean ) now. Easy said, in Malaysia, she's in Form 3 ( 15 years old ) and in this time of age is when I, too having problems with my friends. You see, at this age, we start to get more reserve and starts to find new gangs. We tend to think that our old friends are so outdated with us and think they're just not in to us anymore. They're not in the same frequency as us anymore.

Okay, back to my sis story... She's having probs with her friends that sometimes their relationships are not so good nowadays. Their age is when the word 'CRUSH' always comes into mind and 'LOVE' can break any friendship no matter how close they are before. I know this because I've been there. My sis here, her group of friends consist of 4 girls ( As far as I know ) and one of them have a crush towards a boy. This particular friend is very close to my sis, but my sis is not the type to even bother about crushes or boys at all. So this friend ( labelled as A ), goes to another friend ( which I label as B and she's still in the same group ) to gossips and do what an admirer do best and A left my sis. So my sis, who was left alone, she ends up to be with her other friend ( still in the same group which I label as C ). When A realizes that her feelings towards her crush has gone, she went back to my sis and finds that my sis always hangs out with C. 'A' got mad ( which I don't understand what's the reason is ) at my sis, and (according to what my sis says) A criticises my sis in Twitter. They got in a Tweet fight, but as friends always do, they make up fast. My sis are not satisfied though. She said, she back down in the sake of keeping her anger. Yeah well... on my opinion, obviously it is A's fault. Why would she leave my sis in the first place just for the sake of a boy who she has a crush on? Can you imagine how my sis felt? Which would you prefer? To wait for A like a faithful puppy towards it's master and wait eventhough you're damn lonely; OR go find your other friend ( in the same group ) and hangs out with her for a while? It's not a prob if you hangs out with another friend which is still in the same group. Well what's the point of calling it a group?! You're friends in whole for crying out loud!!!

Okay now, here's a bit of advice base from my experience. If you're in a group of friends with more than two people in it, it is crucial for you to be considerate with your friends' feelings. Don't ignore the others if you want to stick to only one just for a stupid reason. You're just labelling yourself as a selfish person! And we do NOT want that.

Saya teringat, kalau kita kawan bertiga, jangan tinggalkan yang seorang tu sendirian, takut dia tersinggung hati. Ini baru bertiga. Which is hard untuk berlaku adil, but not impossible. It's true because I once start with a group of 5 and finally ends up with a group of 3. Believe it or not, ahlinya pula adalah orang yang berbeza. Well, things happens and I'm grateful for my new group. Ahlinya, sorang ni kawan lama yg dulu pown pernah gaduh skejap ( kawan dari sebelum tadika ) and the other one is a new friend that came along with my childhood friend.

Even in Matriculation, my groups are still in contact, yet I made a new group ( new place always have new friends ). It is a group of three too. I don't know why it has to be three people. Fate maybe?


I think this is enough. It's a long entry and I know it's boring... I hope you guys gets my message. (I'm not a really good writer and I words are always confusing ) Yet, if you have any questions, please do ask without hesitation.
Thank you for reading.

~Cherish your life~
A.Q.

Just A CAmp

Assalamualaikum.. :)
This is a story about a camp I went from last friday to sunday.
Kem ni berlaku di Kem Biro Tatanegara Lipis, Kuala Lipis. And honestly, it's the best camp I've ever been to. It's not about the activities that matters to me.. it's the friends that I gain from there. I learn about true friends. I learn about trust with new friends. It only took us almost 3 days for us to be friends and our friendship will continue on.

Ini kali pertama aku pergi kem yang aku bergaul dengan pelbagai umur. from 16 and above. Boys and Girls,there's not even a single awkwardness between us. Okay, yes there is once. I'm kinda like a new kid there and some of the knew each other (partly from previous camp together). How i got to join this camp? Well, my friend asked me, and another boy came with us. His name is Aniq.

Anyway back to this camp. Overall, there's about 52/53 participants. I don't know really how many of us all. We then divided to 6 groups and I have 9 people in my group. It's 10 if includes with my urusetia of my group. We went through the jungle at night with only one torchlight to guide our way. We fell and tripped and hurt our skin together scrambling in the dark searching for the signs that shows the way. Some teams used more than one torchlight and it's totally unfair for us. After hurdling in the darkness around 3 hours later, we found the end of our tracks and suddenly, one of my team mates went histeric. We have to handle her from 2.30 am all the way till Subuh came.

We left her with someone in charge for prayer. After that we continue on with our journey. They give us a living chicken to take care of as we went for jungle tracking again but this time it's under the sunlight. With the chicken, we swim across the lake and we climb the hills through the jungle and finally, we have to cook the chicken.

Cooking in this camp is very challenging. We are not allowed to make any communication with anyone. No hand signals, no eye contact and of course, no SPEAKING. It's very challenging really! If I were to tell you about this part of the story, it will be a totally long story to tell.

After cooking, we ate them and we have this one activity. We will climb a 60 foot tower and climb down using ropes. I am afraid of heights and I can tell you it is a very high tower. As I got up there, the coach roughly pushed me to the side of the tower and forced me to asked for permission to climb down. As I do as he said, I still clung to the ropes and won't let go. Then the coach pushed my feet of the platform and I fell down, but somehow I could climb down as real as a professional does. I was like wow!! Such a waste of energy for me to struggle with my emotions.

The best adventure ends. In the night, we played games and gains more marks. Somehow my team's marks are the lowest so we fight during the games and got up to third place. We got excited!! :)
Long story after that...

The next day is our last day. It's saddening for us to go to our separate ways... The best part on that day was when they're announcing the best team ever. The team they called as JUARA ( Champion ). And that team is my team! At first we called out the 6th team because their points are the highest but eventually my team's number went up. We were like, "HUH?!!". Honestly, our team were the worst (we thought so). It is very surprising... till the time comes for us to say good bye.

Some of us ride the van and some went for the bus. Some ride their own car. The one who went by car and van we stopped by a place where there's a Pasar Malam Larut Malam are held. In there, there's a karaoke stage and it starts with my friend who wants to sing. We sang together and dance together in public. It was soo much fun.. :)

We then pray for Maghrib at the nearby Masjid, and continue our journey to find a place for dinner. After dinner we start again to go back home...That is the end of my story here.

Thank you for reading~
Assalamualaikum...
~Cherish your life~
A.Q.